This is a site for discussing roleplaying games. Have fun doing so, but there is one major rule: do not discuss political issues that aren't directly and uniquely related to the subject of the thread and about gaming. While this site is dedicated to free speech, the following will not be tolerated: devolving a thread into unrelated political discussion, sockpuppeting (using multiple and/or bogus accounts), disrupting topics without contributing to them, and posting images that could get someone fired in the workplace (an external link is OK, but clearly mark it as Not Safe For Work, or NSFW). If you receive a warning, please take it seriously and either move on to another topic or steer the discussion back to its original RPG-related theme.

So one of my players just commited suicide

Started by TristramEvans, December 17, 2014, 01:44:01 AM

Previous topic - Next topic
Print
Go Down Pages 1 2 3 4
User actions

ArrozConLeche

#30
December 17, 2014, 11:45:44 AM
Very sorry to hear that. Not too long ago our group lost a long time friend.

We knew he was depressed, but short of trying to make sure he at least went to the doctor, we really felt helpless. Finally he did it. I carried some guilt for a while until I realized we tried what we could.

Bren

#31
December 17, 2014, 12:15:19 PM
My sincere and heartfelt condolences to you Tristram and to the friends and family of your friend. What a sad thing for you to learn. Sadly, there are thoughts and feelings inside others that we never can know and at times like this it only leaves us with questions at their passing. Peace.
Currently running: Runequest in Glorantha + Call of Cthulhu   Currently playing: D&D 5E + RQ
My Blog: For Honor...and Intrigue
I have a gold medal from Ravenswing and Gronan owes me bee

YourSwordisMine

#32
December 17, 2014, 12:51:47 PM
Quote from: trechriron;804832Those of us who suffer from depression are very adept at keeping it hidden. There's still some stigma about it and who wants to hang out with a downer?

Your game and the social activity it provided were a good thing for him. It's not your fault.

My condolences to you, his friends and his family.

This is very true.

As someone whose tried to commit suicide twice, once you've made up your mind to do it, the only one who can stop you is yourself... There isn't anything anyone else can do...

Do not blame yourself if you feel you've let them down in some way, you haven't.

My condolences to you and his family.
Quote from: ExploderwizardStarting out as fully formed awesome and riding the awesome train across a flat plane to awesome town just doesn\'t feel like D&D. :)

Quote from: ExploderwizardThe interwebs are like Tahiti - its a magical place.

Starglyte

#33
December 17, 2014, 12:58:47 PM
My condolences. :(

Critias

#34
December 17, 2014, 01:50:23 PM
I'm sorry to hear it.

That said, please don't blame yourself.  It's absolutely normal to blame yourself, but try not to;  what happened isn't your fault, or the fault of your gaming group, or really probably the fault of anyone at all.  It's not your fault if a friend dies of cancer, is it?  Depression is insidious and dangerous and deadly, but, if anything, being a friend, gaming, socializing, and having fun with them, that helped stave it off.

You did what you could have done.
Ugh. Gross. I resent and am embarrassed by the time I spent thinking this site was okay.

saskganesh

#35
December 17, 2014, 02:39:36 PM
That's horrible and I'm sorry.

There is widespread stigma to mental illness and people usually don't seek the therapeutic help that they need. Some people just self medicate instead, which really just adds to their problems. Others just suffer in silence.

Patrick

#36
December 17, 2014, 02:51:22 PM
Sorry to hear this news.  Our thoughts are with you.  Stay strong.

jeff37923

#37
December 17, 2014, 04:09:46 PM
My condolences, I am very sorry to hear that.
"Meh."

danskmacabre

#38
December 17, 2014, 05:13:01 PM
My condolences, Depression is a tough thing to live with.

amacris

#39
December 17, 2014, 10:25:11 PM
Sorry for the loss of your friend.

Molotov

#40
December 17, 2014, 10:47:58 PM
Deepest condolences on your loss.

Jame Rowe

#41
December 17, 2014, 10:49:14 PM
Quote from: trechriron;804832Those of us who suffer from depression are very adept at keeping it hidden. There's still some stigma about it and who wants to hang out with a downer?

Your game and the social activity it provided were a good thing for him. It's not your fault.

My condolences to you, his friends and his family.

Quoted for truth.

My condolences also, and my support for those who struggle with depression.
Here for the games, not for it being woke or not.

Snowman0147

#42
December 17, 2014, 11:24:09 PM
I am sorry for your lost.  Wish I can add more to that.

Planet Algol

#43
December 17, 2014, 11:33:48 PM
I'm sorry for your loss Tristan.
Yeah, but who gives a fuck? You? Jibba?

Well congrats. No one else gives a shit, so your arguments are a waste of breath.

TristramEvans

#44
December 18, 2014, 12:08:27 AM
thanks for all the kind words everyone. I can't really talk just yet. Still processing this I guess. I don't blame myself, but at the same time I keep thinking of ways I could have been a better friend, or spent more time with him.

For some reason this quote by Thoreau has been running through my head constantly the last 2 days:

"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation."

The funeral service is tomorrow. This has caused me to enact several changes in my life. I'll say more later.
Print
Go Up Pages 1 2 3 4
User actions