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Pen & Paper Roleplaying Central => Pen and Paper Roleplaying Games (RPGs) Discussion => Topic started by: cranebump on November 05, 2016, 10:13:43 AM

Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: cranebump on November 05, 2016, 10:13:43 AM
Story time: remember that time an exchange became a campaign staple. My story:

Group of new players in a fantasy campaign, confronting a local antagonist. Antagonist spews some sort of veiled threat. One of the players:"Okay, so I step right up and say something in character." So, I describe the scene: "All right. You stride forward, your weapons bristling from your back and belt. You take a firm stance, place your hands on your hips and bark, "SOMETHING. IN. CHARACTER!"

And that became a staple.

Second thing: Adventure starts in a cell. Same player, above, grabs dice, unprompted, says "I search the CELL!" Rolls. Gets a crit. Well, there's nothing there, so my response was, "You search the shit out of that cell. You crawl across the floor. You feel the bars. You bend down and jam our face into the cracks between the walls. That cell is empty as fuck. It's the emptiest cell you've ever seen. Other than you and your partners, there is nothing but a yawning void of complete emptiness. So much so, that it depresses you."

I almost applied psychic damage just because.

I get reminded of these moments by witnesses to this day.

P.S. There were also plenty of times they gave me back in kind, but I have shoved those down in the vault of GM repression.:-)

Your stories?
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: AsenRG on November 06, 2016, 03:52:38 AM
A player said she was "looking at the item you just described carefully".
"It  looks you back with its shiny surface, you feel, and it has better odds in that competition, because it's got no eyes to blink. Also, you notice some wear and tear on the edges."
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: daniel_ream on November 06, 2016, 05:36:58 AM
In a medium length Star Wars D6 campaign, "It seemed like a good idea at the time" became our "I've got a bad feeling about this".
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: cranebump on November 06, 2016, 08:23:14 AM
Just yesterday, a superhero campaign, modern era, sort of "heroes reborn and they're registered." The detective type PC doesn't have a way to contact the unregistered PC, a superboy type. He rigs a big ol' bat signal with a "T" for Titan, the PCs name. Titan shows. And so does Terraman. And Termite. And Thermal Boy. And Tyrannadon. And...:-)
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: AsenRG on November 07, 2016, 01:17:42 PM
Did all of them get offended that it might have been a call for someone else?
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: cranebump on November 07, 2016, 02:37:09 PM
Quote from: AsenRG;929081Did all of them get offended that it might have been a call for someone else?

There was a bit of offense, but we decided the "T" signal summoned the lamest heroes in Ascension City.:-)  Terrman was a bit put out, however.
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: jeff37923 on November 07, 2016, 02:42:07 PM
Have had the same general game group for the past couple of years. When Real Life gets in the way and a player can't show up, the running joke is that the player character has locked themselves into the bathroom suffering from food poisoning caused by "Taco Tuesday".
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: Dirk Remmecke on November 09, 2016, 04:40:00 AM
GM: "Two or three bears come running at you."
Player: "Two or three? I count again."

Edit: D'oh. I just saw "responses to player actions"...
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: cranebump on November 09, 2016, 07:41:23 PM
Quote from: Dirk Remmecke;929490GM: "Two or three bears come running at you."
Player: "Two or three? I count again."

Edit: D'oh. I just saw "responses to player actions"...

Nah. This is funny.
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: Bren on November 09, 2016, 08:30:14 PM
Quote from: Dirk Remmecke;929490GM: "Two or three bea:Drs come running at you."
Player: "Two or three? I count again."

Edit: D'oh. I just saw "responses to player actions"...
My god man. You see two or three bears running at you and you stand still and recount them? :D
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: AsenRG on November 12, 2016, 04:49:36 AM
Well, depending on distance and available armaments, two bears might be no reason to run, while three might be reason to do so;).
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: Harl Quinn on November 12, 2016, 07:01:51 AM
Quote from: Bren;929686My god man. You see two or three bears running at you and you stand still and recount them? :D

Quote from: AsenRG;930170Well, depending on distance and available armaments, two bears might be no reason to run, while three might be reason to do so;).

Let's get one thing clear - were the bears armed? Were they shooting lasers from their eyes? Either way, it doesn't matter if it's two or three - run, man! RUN!!
Spoiler
(http://www.headinjurytheater.com/images/dndgamma%20laser%20bear%20eyes.jpg)
Spoiler
(http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_oOYWxda3eZw/SjZsesPSqtI/AAAAAAAAC2g/N1H-2ioF-rA/s400/buckR1.jpg)
Spoiler
(http://theminiaturespage.com/news/pics/2011/mar/663200a.jpg)
Don't bother playing dead! Just run!!

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, a fellow GM told me how he once had an NPC bilk a bunch of young murderhobos. He was GMing a group of pre-teens and teens whose characters foolishly gave their horses into the care of a stranger. Into town the party went to get their gear. Upon acquiring their adventuring equipment, they decided they didn't have to pay, put the shopkeeper to the sword, and began pillaging away.

Fleeing the town with a horde of angry villagers on their tails, the murderhobos came across the aforementioned stranger, tending a different group of horses. The stranger, who was oddly amicable about the whole ordeal, sold them... their own horses after he had painted them different colors!

In a three-player Star Wars game I was in, we were a trio of Jedi whose ship was about to be boarded by Separatist battle droids. Knowing they wouldn't bother taking us prisoner, we opted to go out defiantly, by running to the cargo hold and jumping into liquid carbonite. The GM decided that in our defiance, we left the battle droids a message in our positions. These weren't positions of serenity or agony. No, the GM decided that one of my compatriots was flipping them the bird; Jedi #2 grabbed his crotch before being sealed in; and my character... was mooning them... :D


Harl
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: Bren on November 12, 2016, 09:22:00 AM
Ah yes. Lazar Bears (https://i.ytimg.com/vi/tm2QGSY6Q4A/maxresdefault.jpg). My favorite response for the times when the computer ended up kicking my ass in Age of Mythology.

Quote from: Harl Quinn;930177Fleeing the town with a horde of angry villagers on their tails, the murderhobos came across the aforementioned stranger, tending a different group of horses. The stranger, who was oddly amicable about the whole ordeal, sold them... their own horses after he had painted them different colors!
:D

QuoteIn a three-player Star Wars game I was in, we were a trio of Jedi whose ship was about to be boarded by Separatist battle droids. Knowing they wouldn't bother taking us prisoner, we opted to go out defiantly, by running to the cargo hold and jumping into liquid carbonite. The GM decided that in our defiance, we left the battle droids a message in our positions. These weren't positions of serenity or agony. No, the GM decided that one of my compatriots was flipping them the bird; Jedi #2 grabbed his crotch before being sealed in; and my character... was mooning them... :D
Your effort was wasted. Battle droids don't get sarcasm...or humor. :p

I'm not sure if Neimondians do either.
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: cranebump on November 12, 2016, 11:08:24 AM
Quote from: Harl Quinn;930177In a three-player Star Wars game I was in, we were a trio of Jedi whose ship was about to be boarded by Separatist battle droids. Knowing they wouldn't bother taking us prisoner, we opted to go out defiantly, by running to the cargo hold and jumping into liquid carbonite. The GM decided that in our defiance, we left the battle droids a message in our positions. These weren't positions of serenity or agony. No, the GM decided that one of my compatriots was flipping them the bird; Jedi #2 grabbed his crotch before being sealed in; and my character... was mooning them... :D


Harl

This, I must salute. Har, indeed (golf clap)...splendid, sir...splendid...
Title: Funny Responses to player actions
Post by: Skarg on November 12, 2016, 11:29:02 AM
I hope the Separatists haven't hired Har Har Kinks, the Gungan madman interrogator.