Don't feel bad about being a fatbeard...

Kyle Aaron · December 14, 2006, 08:12:46 PM

... some of your favourite game designers are, too!

Gary Gygax,

Dave Arneson,

Steve Jackson (US),

Monte Cook had a shave recently, but he's still not exactly buff,

Artist Larry Elmore, famous for his girls of big boobs and bigger hair (he warped my fragile little adolescent mind)

Artist Jeff Easely,

Uncle Ronny shows his Indie Cred by being clean-shaven! Only when he grows at least a goatee can he become mainstream and achieve respectable sales! Of course, by the look of his midsection, he's also fond of cheetos and pizza like the rest of us. I guess you don't get ripped abs studying bat penises.

So don't feel bad about being a fatbeard. Some of your favourite game industry guys are fatbeards. Okay, to be honest I don't know if they inhabit their parents' basements or not, but still, there you are - virtually every successful game industry guy has got a beard and belly. You NEED that to be credible!

I mean, come on, if this buff guy was a game designer, would you take him seriously?

Blackleaf · December 14, 2006, 08:19:20 PM

I don't think that term is just about being heavy set with facial hair.

This definition got the most "thumbs up" from Urban Dictionary (this is the first definition link for "Fatbeard" via Google)

QuoteA fat, smelly, nerdy white guy with a beard and long hair whose into stereotypically dorky hobbies/interests such as comic books, sci-fi, anime, traditional RPGs, colectible card games, LARPing, and/or furry art.

Rarely seen in public, they only come out of their parent's basements to attend conventions of their favorite interests, such as Star Trek, Inuyasha, or furry porn. Fatbeards have the personality of a wood plank.

Fatbeards are also known as:
trekkie, otaku, Linux user, cosplayer, Wapanese, furry, LARPer, otherkin, and loser.

The Comic Book Dealer from The Simpsons embodies what a fatbeard is.

Ouch.

Edit: Traditional RPGs???

laffingboy · December 14, 2006, 08:20:15 PM

We're a bulky hobby, to be sure.

James McMurray · December 14, 2006, 08:22:49 PM

May you rot in hell for putting that picture of David Hasselhoff in my brain. I hope you know that if I commit suicide in the near future it's all because of that.

Blackleaf · December 14, 2006, 08:29:27 PM

Ron Edwards looks just a little bit like... Frasier Crane.

That's awesome.

Kyle Aaron · December 14, 2006, 08:31:31 PM

Quote from: StuartEdit: Traditional RPGs???

See what I mean? If you're indie, you gotta be clean-shaven. If the Hoff were a game designer, he'd definitely be indie.

Quote from: James McMurrayMay you rot in hell for putting that picture of David Hasselhoff in my brain. I hope you know that if I commit suicide in the near future it's all because of that.

Yeah, yeah, that's what you say out here, but I just got a PM from you,

Quote from: James McMurrayO jimboboz thx so much teh Hoff is totally h4wt i think ill use that pix 4 my next character!!!1!

fonkaygarry · December 14, 2006, 09:41:52 PM

Quote from: StuartRon Edwards looks just a little bit like... Frasier Crane.

That's awesome.

WRONG, FOOL!

He is clearly the anti-matter version of the Internet's own James Lileks!

Blackleaf · December 14, 2006, 10:56:23 PM

Maybe he does know what he's talking about with gamers and brain-damage! :eek:

fonkaygarry · December 14, 2006, 11:08:27 PM

If wan can somehow get all of them in the same place at once, I think we'll be able to push them into each other, Timecop style, and create a perfect human, who will then best Kevin Siembeda in single combat and return Palladium to the people.

Dominus Nox · December 14, 2006, 11:27:39 PM

Quote from: StuartI don't think that term is just about being heavy set with facial hair.

This definition got the most "thumbs up" from Urban Dictionary (this is the first definition link for "Fatbeard" via Google)

Ouch.

Edit: Traditional RPGs???

Hmmm, so this negative term only applies to white guys? Sounds like a case of clear and blatant racism to me.

As to fatbeards having the personality of a wood plank, well if you put the word "pompous" in front of "wood plank" you'd have steve jackson down pat.

TonyLB · December 14, 2006, 11:28:32 PM

Quote from: JimBobOzSee what I mean? If you're indie, you gotta be clean-shaven. If the Hoff were a game designer, he'd definitely be indie.

Y'know, outside of RPG circles I would have read "traditional RPG" less as being about different modes of publishing and more as a phrase meant to distinguish "Activities that involve dice and cheetos" from "activities that involve naughty maid outfits and licorice underwear."

Although ... y'know ... a case could be made for the latter having more right to call itself "traditional," so maybe I'm just completely wrong.

RPGPundit · December 15, 2006, 12:53:40 AM

AGHHH MY EYES!! THE GOGGLES DO NOTHING!! Save us from the Hasslehof!!!

RPGPundit

Sosthenes · December 15, 2006, 01:57:38 AM

I'm much more scared by the Ron Edwards cameltoe.

Casey777 · December 15, 2006, 02:11:13 AM

Settembrini · December 15, 2006, 03:44:10 AM

QuoteIf wan can somehow get all of them in the same place at once, I think we'll be able to push them into each other, Timecop style, and create a perfect human, who will then best Kevin Siembeda in single combat and return Palladium to the people.

Pictures in my mind!

Kevin has awesome abilities [summon fanboiz and ignore reality for up to ten years are the mightiest], though. Would be a hard fight.