Oh God, where to start...
It's *almost* as bad as the D&D movie, and it rips off every single movie you can imagine.
Lord of the Rings? Check.
Star Wars? Check.
Dragonheart? Check.
Breakfast at Tiffany's? Well, not really, but I'm sure they tried.
There's the blatant politically correct message, represented by the black leader of hordes of very, very white and nordic rebels. I repeat: he's the single black character you'll see in this Tolkienesque setting. Oh, there's his daughter too, but I'm willing to bet that she'll hook up with the traitor's son. It's. So. Bloody. Obvious.
You also have to wonder what the hell is John Malkovich smoking. Dude, is your drug habit that expensive? At least Jeremy Irons is marginally better than in D&D, probably because he's replaying his Kingdom of Heaven character. Sienna Guillory is cute, but this is an example of when you mix one bottle of shit with another one of good whisky: you end up with two bottles of shit.
Speaking of characters, I couldn't stop laughing when Murtaugh appears. It screams "Hey, my first character died! What do you think about this one?" to anyone who has played RPGs.
Ed Speelers should be shot. His character, Eragon, is the worst Mary Sue I've seen in years. If this was a gaming group, there'd be riots and dead people because of the GM's pet character.
And the dragon. Oh dear... It's such an awful attempt at cuteness that YOU WANT TO TEAR YOUR EYES OUT OF THEIR SOCKETS. The less is said about Rachel Weisz' voice acting, the better.
Oh, and what kind of bakery has fortune-tellers? And what about Jeremy Irons being as fast in his horse as a freaking flying dragon? Don't tell me you didn't ask that to yourself when you see him at the dungeon...
As a matter of fact, if you haven't seen it yet, don't bother with it.
Movie Grade: D
Sanity Loss: C
Hawtness Index: C
Badass Factor: D
FX: B-
Quote from: JongWKOh God, where to start...
It starts and ends by knowing who wrote the book this is based on, and thus never wasting any money on this.
I can forgive anything if it contains good swordfighting. Does it?
Thanks, Jong! Not that I was likely to spend money on this one.
I liked it.
I went in, not having read the book, looking for a way to kill two hours. I got swordfighting, guys blasting each other with magic beams, a couple laffs, a hot chick, and two guys on dragons (one of them made out of, like, hell-fire) beating the shit out of each other at the end.
A good, entertaining, fast-paced action movie. Citizen Kane it ain't, but it's in color and the pictures move.
This movie was great for twelve year old boys.If you've still got use of more than six of your brain cells you'll walk away saddened at what other people can get financed for.
***SPOILERS IN THIS POST***
Eight Thoughts About Eragon:
1. Was I the only one creeped-out by the sultry-voiced female dragon repeatedly telling the thinly (bordering on non) veiled stand-in for the author how only he can "ride" her?
2. Before the brilliant deduction that Jeremy Irons used to be a dragon rider, what did they all assume he was? Some random dude who just happens to know know all about dragons and magic and apparently carries a gigantic dragon saddle bigger than he is around everywhere he goes for the hell of it?
3. Where was he keeping that saddle, anyway?
4. While we're at it, how did he manage to arrive at the wizard's stronghold just a minute or two after the hero when he had no dragon to ride on?
5. Were the bad guy's henchmen supposed to be orc-type monsters or just fat dudes? If monsters, some more makeup would have helped...
6. On the plus side, I thought that they were called Urkles when they were first introduced, and that temporarily improved the movie a lot for me.
7. Talk about the worst villains ever. John Malkovich just doesn't have the pipes to play an evil overlord. He just sounds like a petulant weiner.
And the other dude? Looked like Data was running gayvampire.exe in the goddamn holodeck.
8. Isn't Murtaugh getting too old for this shit?
...
Sorry.
Anyway, grade F all the way. One of the worse films of a poor year.
Some well-meaning person bought me the novel for Christmas. It has ads for PS3 and X-Box 360 Eragon games in it.
Quote from: jdrakehSome well-meaning person bought me the novel for Christmas. It has ads for PS3 and X-Box 360 Eragon games in it.
What? In the text?
"Oh Eragon, however are we to defeat the evil lord Malkovich."
"Fear not! For his plan is unveiled to me once I get to the next level. Grab a controller for the arcane XBOX360 and help me in co-op mode."
"Ah but Eragon, I am cursed by the wizards at Sony and can only play upon their Playstation3"
"Curses!"
Something like that was actually done in the early German Terry Pratchett books, advertising soup. I'm not kidding.
Haha. :) I liked it, but I took my two boys (age 8 and 6).
It's a movie with CGI dragons and crap. What were you expecting?
Something fun and entertaining. As it turns out, it was neither.
Quote from: Serious PaulSomething fun and entertaining. As it turns out, it was neither.
Seriously? It was Eragon. It was a book written by like a 17 year old kid on the level of like.. fan fiction. Dude, he just changed the letter 'd' to an e' to name the central character! It's that kind of movie.
You guys are so serious sometimes, it kills me.
And how the HELL did a 17 year old who wrote Star Wars with Dragons get a) a book deal and b) a MOVIE deal - buh?
Quote from: Abyssal MawYou guys are so serious sometimes, it kills me.
When I pay for something I expect to get what I paid for. I didn't walk in expecting to be wowed, or have some sort of life changing moment. I figured it would be a mildly entertaining B movie. I figured wrong.
Quote from: WerekoalaAnd how the HELL did a 17 year old who wrote Star Wars with Dragons get a) a book deal and b) a MOVIE deal - buh?
Rumored: His parents own/run a publishing company, so no book deal needed. Add hype for being a book by a teen, lots of sales over the years (and, no... I don't know why other than foramentioned hype) and you get a movie deal.
Plus, as ripped off and formulaic as it is, it appeals to the lowest common denominator, thus assuring a certain minimum of sales. CGI dragons do the rest.