TheRPGSite

The Lounge => Media and Inspiration => Topic started by: Mr. Christopher on April 21, 2007, 03:08:30 PM

Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Mr. Christopher on April 21, 2007, 03:08:30 PM
So I just found out that one of my wife's bosses is a lawncrapper.

Specifically, this woman goes out jogging in the early hours of the morning every day, and if she has to answer the call of nature, no problem. She'll answer it in the gutter, by the side of an unpaved road, or even on people's lawns. Apparently this created an awkward situation for her at a upscale party when one of the guests identified the lady as the Unknown Lawncrapper he'd chased out of his yard one morning.

She's intelligent, professional, reasonably good-looking... and a lawncrapper.

Next time I see her, should I ask if she's a gamer?
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: C.W.Richeson on April 21, 2007, 03:24:05 PM
It's hard to imagine a more awkward encounter.

I've never known a gamer who shat in people's yards, though I've had gamers urinate on my carpet.
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Grimjack on April 21, 2007, 03:28:13 PM
Quote from: C.W.RichesonIt's hard to imagine a more awkward encounter.

I've never known a gamer who shat in people's yards, though I've had gamers urinate on my carpet.

I've had a few back in college that I thought crapped their pants.

My brother in law claims he has some kind of stomach issue that makes him have to go immediately when the urge strikes.  The dude has probably crapped all over town by now, even on the lawn of the church on Christmas Eve.  If that doesn't send you straight to hell I don't know what will.
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Dominus Nox on April 21, 2007, 04:19:54 PM
Quote from: GrimjackI've had a few back in college that I thought crapped their pants.

My brother in law claims he has some kind of stomach issue that makes him have to go immediately when the urge strikes.  The dude has probably crapped all over town by now, even on the lawn of the church on Christmas Eve.  If that doesn't send you straight to hell I don't know what will.


Why, playing D&D, of course. I thought everyone knew that. Don't you read Jack Chick? :rotfl:
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Grimjack on April 21, 2007, 05:36:04 PM
Quote from: Dominus NoxWhy, playing D&D, of course. I thought everyone knew that. Don't you read Jack Chick? :rotfl:
:hatsoff:  LOL.  I think that is the real reason they killed Blackleaf...she was a floor crapper.
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Thanatos02 on April 21, 2007, 06:03:28 PM
Quote from: Grimjack:hatsoff:  LOL.  I think that is the real reason they killed Blackleaf...she was a floor crapper.

Shit, I'd kill her if she shat on my floor; hanging herself be damned.
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Dominus Nox on April 21, 2007, 11:06:24 PM
Quote from: Thanatos02Shit, I'd kill her if she shat on my floor; hanging herself be damned.


So then, how do we Know that you DIDN'T kill her and make it look like a suicide,   hanging her and writing the note yourself, hmmm?

Just exactly where were you when she died and do you have witnesses?:hmm:
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Thanatos02 on April 21, 2007, 11:14:53 PM
Quote from: Dominus NoxSo then, how do we Know that you DIDN'T kill her and make it look like a suicide,   hanging her and writing the note yourself, hmmm?
Quite simply, you don't. :eek:
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Black Flag on April 22, 2007, 01:26:15 AM
To the OP: That has got to be some sort of kink. She just likes to feel naughty and leave a lil' surprise for people to find next to their morning paper. Or maybe she likes to pretend she's a frolicking forest creature. Regardless, there's no way she could just nonchalantly do that and think nothing of it. And what does she do about :toiletpaper: ???

Nice avatar, btw. I have that album somewhere.
Title: Lawncrapper!
Post by: Mr. Christopher on April 22, 2007, 06:45:35 PM
Quote from: Black FlagTo the OP: That has got to be some sort of kink. She just likes to feel naughty and leave a lil' surprise for people to find next to their morning paper. Or maybe she likes to pretend she's a frolicking forest creature. Regardless, there's no way she could just nonchalantly do that and think nothing of it. And what does she do about :toiletpaper: ???
Like Grimjack's brother-in-law, this woman shrugs off other people's reactions and claims when she's gotta go, she's gotta go... but she hasn't blamed it on any diseases either. So I reckon you're right, the only sickness in her body is the brain.

QuoteNice avatar, btw. I have that album somewhere.
Hey, any man who's spit on his hands and hoisted the black flag is a friend of mine. I'll get a knife. :cool: