A while ago I shared a pdf of a sci-fi game I've been working on, called Irregulars. I've had some good feedback and suggestions, and have made some changes to the first draft to create what is hopefully getting close to a final version.
Rather than share the full newer version just now, I plan on sharing a few samples and sections to get more specific thoughts and opinions from people.
First up, the 4 page Introduction. Below is a link to get it from my Google Drive:
IRREGULARS Introduction (https://drive.google.com/open?id=12RwoCajECWcTwrof_EQHVHx1oecfJORQ)
Do you think it works as an introduction? Does it give enough relevant information to let you decide if you want to learn more of the game?
What is a RPG? is a waste of space. Instead tell us what makes Irregulars different than other RPGs, or give us your philosophy on RPGing and how that's reflected in Irregulars.
20 D8s??? No. No. No. Use D6 and max out at 10.
I've read 4 pages and I have zero idea WTF your game is about.
Why are you telling me what each chapter is about? Chapter 15 Spacecraft doesn't need an explanation.
The market has plenty of generic SciFi games. Why should anybody give a fuck about yours? THAT must jump out in the first paragraph. We use too many D8s is NOT a marketing plan. After reading your intro, I have NO clue WTF an Irregular might be. That's bad.
You MUST put whatever is special and unique about your RPG up front and center.