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Other Games, Development, & Campaigns => Design, Development, and Gameplay => Topic started by: Sean on November 12, 2007, 02:21:11 PM

Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Sean on November 12, 2007, 02:21:11 PM
So, people, if you're pissed off with what you've heard about the 4th edition -what do you want for the 5th Edition in terms of RULES, SETTING or FEEL.

Now I know y'all have the souls of poets, so please feel free to express yourselves in the form of Haiku

Mine's a bit crap -

deep in the forest
eager farmboys far from home
it's not Exalted


(or maybe that's a bit 'A+ Fantasy')

desperate heroes
the enemy approaches
we have 10' poles


See, I'm awful !

(Haiku is usually a 17-syllable verse form consisting of three metrical units of 5, 7, and 5 syllables, I think)
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Bradford C. Walker on November 12, 2007, 06:11:52 PM
A $20 PHB with nothing but the rules needed to play, one race (Humans) and three classes (Fighter, Rogue, Sorceror).  A $40 DMG that has all of the rules needed to run the game.  A $30 MM that has all of the iconic monsters needed.

All other races and classes are setting-specific and thus confined to setting supplements.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Sean on November 12, 2007, 07:06:58 PM
races and classes
other than those in the core
buy another book


I wanted 4x, a bit like Rolemaster express at a similar price, it ain't gonna happen, so for 5x:

cheaper basic set
one book for the setting and
one for the system
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Blackleaf on November 12, 2007, 07:23:47 PM
Dungeons & Dragons
New editions not for me
Fonzie jumped the shark

:haw:
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Settembrini on November 13, 2007, 01:29:41 PM
E. G. Gygax built
building blocks interaction
are back for good
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Dr Rotwang! on November 13, 2007, 03:17:47 PM
A fifth edition
Will not replace the books I use
Castles And Crusades
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: droog on November 13, 2007, 05:48:35 PM
A fifth edition?
You have more money than sense
Wizards call the tune
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Pierce Inverarity on November 13, 2007, 05:57:11 PM
"Eladrin" sounds like
Viagra for designers
Choke on it, Noonan
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Sean on November 14, 2007, 05:01:00 PM
what a good start
basho, byron, baudelaire
spinning in the grave



c'mon the rest of you :)
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: droog on November 16, 2007, 07:17:22 PM
Children mob the shops
Buying shiny books and dice
Market expansion!

The children construct
Network externalities
D&D hits gold....

Bradford C. Walker
Fails the poetry form test
It's 5-7-5!
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Bradford C. Walker on November 17, 2007, 03:03:26 PM
Apathetic I
Post as I desire on
What delights me now.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: droog on November 17, 2007, 04:20:22 PM
A little better
But please fix the middle line
Still six syllables
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: SgtSpaceWizard on November 20, 2007, 02:48:21 PM
first ed was fine, thanks
simulates appendix N
not dragonball Z
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Lord Hobie on November 20, 2007, 03:14:42 PM
Edition before
Like Dungeon! but simpler.  Ugh...
Wizards sold rights?  YES!

Lord Hobie
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Sean on November 20, 2007, 03:50:04 PM
sweet!  :D
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 21, 2007, 04:55:28 AM
As a monk, I will
Basho those elderitch creatures
and then take their stuff.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 21, 2007, 05:02:06 AM
Malcolm X's pot
calls the kettle black; 1st ed
calls 3rd ed complex.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: SgtSpaceWizard on November 21, 2007, 01:35:29 PM
This is the best thread!

Double weapons sucked
What the hell were they thinking?
Just give me an axe
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Blackleaf on November 21, 2007, 03:53:38 PM
Half Dragon Ninjas
Kewl powerz and dungeon punk
What total garbage

:haw:
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: droog on November 22, 2007, 03:25:46 AM
The old faithful sigh
Long time Erol Otus fans
Not trendy Jap crap
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 22, 2007, 09:09:51 AM
Dungeons and Dragons.
Excellent despite some flaws.
I want more of this.

Second edition.
Even better than at first:
Revised and improved.

Now third edition.
Too much shit to keep track of.
I don't like it much.

Three point five is out.
Rule upon rule upon rule.
Can not cope with this.

Open Game License.
Endless flood of supplements.
Munchkin nirvana.

"Use all supplements!"
Super-entitled players
Demand of GMs.

Power inflation.
Prestige classes multiply.
No more can I bear.

Fourth edition soon?
More third-party supplements?
No. No! DO NOT WANT!

Perhaps Savage Worlds.
Maybe New World of Darkness?
I might try Scion.

T & T might do.
Unisystem worth a look.
-Cinematic form.

D & D is gone.
I mourn the loss of it now.
But can not go back.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: James J Skach on November 22, 2007, 09:42:02 AM
It is for the win
Cerulean Lion is
crowned the Haiku King
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 23, 2007, 04:26:44 AM
everyone praises
(where (n) is the one out now)
(n-1) ed.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 23, 2007, 04:50:01 AM
Big-haired, blond, white-skinned
Indians. Seriously -
racist, or just strange?
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 23, 2007, 11:56:17 AM
Quote from: Age of Fableeveryone praises
(where (n) is the one out now)
(n-1) ed.

Age of Fable makes
A very clever haiku.
He deserves some praise.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 23, 2007, 11:57:35 AM
Quote from: Age of FableBig-haired, blond, white-skinned
Indians. Seriously -
racist, or just strange?

Very strange this sounds.
To what does it refer though?
I do not know this.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Christmas Ape on November 23, 2007, 11:59:52 AM
This thread is going
Remarkably off topic.
Cherry blossoms fall.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 23, 2007, 12:05:47 PM
Quote from: Christmas ApeThis thread is going
Remarkably off topic.
Cherry blossoms fall.

Topic drift sets in.
Sometimes this is a good thing.
Sometimes it is not.

Is it good this time?
Well -- I have an excuse to
Write some more Haiku.

:)
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Sean on November 23, 2007, 06:20:17 PM
rows of new product
undeserving poetry
bow to your talents :D
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 24, 2007, 09:36:35 AM
Quote from: Cerulean Lion
Quote from: Age of FableBig-haired, blond, white-skinned
Indians. Seriously -
racist, or just strange?
Very strange this sounds.
To what does it refer though?
I do not know this.
In Forgotten Realms
they have pictures of these guys
whose name I forgot.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 24, 2007, 09:40:14 AM
Quote from: Cerulean LionAge of Fable makes
A very clever haiku.
He deserves some praise.

Thanks Cerulean!
You know, I wish 'lion' had
one less syllable.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 24, 2007, 11:02:10 AM
Quote from: Age of FableIn Forgotten Realms
they have pictures of these guys
whose name I forgot.

White-skinned Indians?
(Cerulean: baffled shrug.)
I do not know them.

The Forgotten Realms?
More than a few odd things there.
Just look at the Drow.

Evil Elves they are.
Black their skin: Evil their hearts.
Each and every one.

Now is this racist?
Not at all says T. S. R.
No racist intent.

Black-skinned evil folk.
Even if not intended,
Racist in effect.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Christmas Ape on November 25, 2007, 06:22:21 AM
Quote from: Cerulean LionBlack-skinned evil folk.
Even if not intended,
Racist in effect.
And they are ruled
By women; how did Gary
Get away with it?
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 25, 2007, 11:57:52 AM
Quote from: Christmas ApeAnd they are ruled
By women; how did Gary
Get away with it?

Did Gary do it?
Was it Gary Gygax who
Invented the Drow?

When they first appeared
Was Gary the editor?
Fiend Folio, yes?

Perhaps someone else
Was responsible for this -
"Less than wise" concept.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Christmas Ape on November 25, 2007, 12:34:28 PM
Well, he's been quoted
From a thread over on EN
World; he seems quite clear.

"As I created
them, there are no good drow
save the insane" - Gary

I don't think any
Other person gets the blame
This one's all on him.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 25, 2007, 12:46:55 PM
This I am sorry
To hear. Badly mistaken
Idea at best.

The racist image
Even if inadvertent
Is painful to see.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Bradford C. Walker on November 25, 2007, 07:19:34 PM
All that I've wanted
To be since the age of three
Was a Jedi Knight
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: droog on November 26, 2007, 03:43:30 AM
Patience, young Walker
You are not a Jedi yet
Use the Force, Bradford
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 26, 2007, 04:23:15 AM
Hey Wizards, where's my
System Reference Document?
I don't pay for games.
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Christmas Ape on November 26, 2007, 04:59:24 AM
Quote from: Age of FableHey Wizards, where's my
System Reference Document?
I don't pay for games.
This is probably
A terrible position
To ask for things from.

"I'll never give you
A thin dime of my money;
Now where's my free shit?"

They are a business
And owe all the freeloaders
Not a fucking thing.

(Not that I don't think
I'll end up running 4e
From the SRD

At least for the first
Adventure; this seems like a
different game, no?)
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 26, 2007, 07:44:33 AM
My dictionary
has nothing for 'irony'
just an ape's picture.

:keke:
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 26, 2007, 11:04:10 AM
Use the S R D
Even if you don't buy it.
That's what it's there for.

But I do agree
If you do not plan to buy,
Don't demand freebies.

Take if they give them -
Just do not act entitled.
Smile and say "Thank you".
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Age of Fable on November 27, 2007, 06:59:43 AM
you know that thing where
you say things that you don't mean
as part of a joke?
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Cerulean Lion on November 27, 2007, 04:59:36 PM
Quote from: Age of Fableyou know that thing where
you say things that you don't mean
as part of a joke?


I know of that thing.
Sometimes I even notice
When people do it. :)
Title: D&D 5th Edition Haiku Throwdown
Post by: Werekoala on November 28, 2007, 11:17:39 PM
If I want to play
Elf chick with giant boobies
Blizzard gets my cash

Stunts, feats, or powerz
MMO contrivances
Cover heart of game

10 foot by 10 foot
Rooms full of pissed off ogres
Make me sigh with joy